I had to make a late night run to Home Depot the other night. Everybody there, like the guy in front of me buying a hatchet, seemed like they were up to no good. Then i realized I was buying 5 rolls of plastic sheeting and some duct tape.

"JERK EAGLE"

This weekend we were at the Santa Barbara Zoo where something hysterical happened. Some Jerk Eagle was flying around and spotted the zoo and thought "buffet". He was camped out in a tree all day enjoying his Federally Protected Status, while leisurely deciding which exotic delicacy to eat first. The zoo animals and staff were palpably nervous and the zoo even sent out two volunteer ladies in folding chairs to sit by the flamingos and otters and "keep an eye on them". I'm not sure how it turned out but he was still up there when we left and probably wasn't getting any less hungry as time went on.